All About the Boobies

So, I thought I would dedicate a post to breastfeeding. If you're a mother or will be one soon, and you haven't heard what I'm about to say next a million times, don't worry, you will.

Breastfeeding is the best and most natural thing you can do for your baby. However, even though it's natural, doesn't mean it comes naturally.

OK, that's out of the way. By the by, that statement is 112% true.

First of all, if you really want to breastfeed, not a damn thing that happens will keep you from being able to do it. OK, possibly if you were in a horrible accident and your boobs were somehow cut off, that might stop you. But otherwise, come hell or high water, your baby is going to drink milk out of your nipples!

I may not be the best person to write a motivational post about making it through the tough times of breastfeeding, because Camille has been a total dream when it comes to breastfeeding. She latched on right away, about 3 minutes after being born, and she's had zero nipple confusion even though I pump and give her milk from a bottle sometimes. The only thing that she doesn't get an A on is her ability to leak as much milk as she drinks. Half of it stays in her mouth and half of it ends up on her clothes, her face, my clothes, etc... so now I put a towel down when she eats. Problem solved. She gets a B.

Anyway, hell or high water... yeah yeah. If you really really really want to breastfeed, nothing will stop you. And at times, it can be trying. Like if you have a baby that won't latch on. Or if you have inverted nipples. Or if you get mastitis. Yikes! I'm so glad I didn't get mastitis.

For first-time mommies who are aspiring first-time breastfeeders, here is Taylor's List of Necessary Things to Know/Have in Regards to Breastfeeding. Or simply put, THE LIST!

1. It might not come naturally.
Your baby is new at breastfeeding (shit, your baby is new at breathing, so give the little tyke a break if s/he doesn't get eating right on the first try), and you probably are, too. Remember that stress and tension make breastfeeding even harder, because both of those things inhibit the let-down reflex. For the first few days, your baby won't be sucking much out of your boobies as it is (besides, their tummy is sooooo tiny!), so don't even worry about it if things don't take off seamlessly. You have a couple of days to practice before your real milk will come in.

2. It might hurt.
There are books and other info about breastfeeding that say, "you won't feel any discomfort whatsoever as long as your baby has a good latch." I'm here to tell you that that statement is horse shit. In the same vein of "baby isn't perfect at this," the little stinker might have a less-than-perfect latch. Sometimes, Camille is a lazy baby and won't open her mouth all the way. When she does this, I don't even have to look at her to tell something is wrong; I can feel the pain! So I take her off and put her back on properly. But even when she's had a perfect latch, I still felt some pain. There were a few days when I didn't want to nurse because it hurt. But it also hurt to be engorged, and you will leak everywhere if you have any amount of milk in you and your baby starts to cry. Seriously. So I'd stick her on, grit my teeth through a couple of moments of pain, and then it would go away. Even when she had a great latch, sometimes it hurt. End of story.

3. You'll probably feel like crap for a couple of days.
There is something called "milk fever" that will feel like you have the flu. This is not mastitis (although mastitis can feel like the flu in the early stages). You'll get a slight fever (mine was 99ish), be achy, and of course, your boobs will hurt. This will go away within a few days and is nothing to worry about. It's just your body doing some magic boobie mojo.

4. Your boobs will get HUGE.
I don't think I need to elaborate on this one. But seriously. You're going to need a new bra, or seven. Nursing bras are the tops!

5. You WILL need breast pads.
Remember that thing I said earlier about boobies leaking? Yeah. A breast pad is basically a diaper for your boobs. I use Lansinoh pads, but there are oodles of brands of them. Use whichever ones suit you best. All I know is, if I didn't have many many of these pads on hand, there would be breast milk on everything I own. Even the TV.

6. A pump will become your bestest friend.
Even if you want to exclusively breastfeed and don't plan on pumping and storing, get at least a hand-held pump anyway. There are times when you will be SO FULL of milk that you want to jam your baby's mouth on your nipples and scream "EAT!" This won't work. The baby will probably just cry. Don't try it. What you can do is feed the baby and then pump your overly full boobies until they're at a nice, comfortable level. Maybe only half full instead of bursting at the seams. It will make you feel soooooo much better, and you won't get mad at your baby for not sucking you dry.

7. Your baby might eat like a piggy.

Camille eats like a piggy. She gets milk everywhere. So come prepared with a towel of some kind. Also, there are some sources that will tell you a breastfed baby won't spit up. This is also horse shit. They don't spit up a ton, but they do spit up a little, and even a little spit up can wreck a shirt.

For those of you who will be pumping, keep in mind that not all breastmilk is created equal. The first bit of breastmilk (called "foremilk") that comes out kinda looks like skim milk. It's thinner, and basically serves to quench the baby's thirst/hunger. The nutritious milk (called "hindmilk") comes a little bit later, and it will look a lot thicker (a little thicker than whole milk, not quite half and half). This is where all the good stuff comes from. If you pump only the foremilk and don't include the hindmilk, your baby won't be getting all the best stuff. S/he won't starve or anything, but it won't quite be as good as drinking straight from the boobie. My solution to this is simple. The pump I have (a Medela) had 2.5oz storage containers and 5oz bottles. I will pump into the 5oz bottle until all the milk is out of a boob (which is usually right about 5oz), and then I'll mix that up and pour the mixed milk into the separate 2.5oz storage containers. This way, one doesn't have all the foremilk, and the other all the hindmilk. It's an even mix. Ta da! I don't know if that's necessary, but I do it anyway because I'm a weirdo.